The Turning point part 2

I was only six months pregnant yet I was in the ER at Magees Women Hospital in Pittsburgh vomiting as the doctor explained to my mother and me that I was four centimeters dilated. Life as it was in this moment seemed surreal to me. I was sure this was nothing but a nightmare that would end any minute now not knowing that the nightmare had just begun.

I was in a trance; everything seemed slow and fast all at once I looked at my mom who is a RN, BSN looking for answers. My mother constantly caressed my hand and told me that all is well she had no signs of panic in her face; she just kept on praying in whispers. I cannot recall everything that transpired from the ER to the labor room but I can tell you is that I heard words like Indomethacin, not working, check, epidural, amniotic fluid.

I later understood that the doctors tried their best to keep me from delivering but the Indomethacin was not working so they felt that it was an infection and then had to use the epidural which I had initially opted not to use but now it was a must because it was a necessity my axiomatic fluid was extracted to check of any pending infection. The results later reveled that I had E. coli in my amniotic fluid and if swallowed by my baby it could lead to severe medical issues and even death. The doctors made a choice to deliver my son as soon as possible he was out in three pushes.

I only saw something that looked like a furry rat. My son weighed 1Ibs 4oz. I was scared of it and I could remember looking and my mother as she was saying how cute he was and in my head thinking that her prescription glasses needed to me checked out. The ordeal was over as soon as it started and my son was rushed down to the NICU.  My mother had already called my husband during my contractions. He did his best to make it by driving form Arlington VA but arrived after the birth of our son.

My thoughts were still all over the place. I was worried about what people would think because of my cultural background, most people who are different are shunned. I did not even shed a tear at the time. I put on my game face assuring everyone around me that I was fine, I still had no emotion that I could tap into I just felt blank.

 

My husband wheeled me down to the NICU to see our son. The blue light was on him to cure him of his jaundice. I had never seen anything so tiny in my life and I felt upset and angry because I had already gained a considerable amount of weight and yet he was so little. My husband just stood there in shock because this was our first child and now we were faced with many uncertainties. I was unsure if my son would survive and if he did what was the quality of life would he have.